To the BEARPONG review…
Nathan and I had a professor years ago at UF that always told us that if you’re going to do anything, swing for the fences and do it big. I think the crew over at BEARPONG had the same kind of professor.
Remember how much bigger everything looked like when you were a little kid? Your dad was a giant, your elementary school was the size of Rhode Island and 5th-graders were some big motherfuckers. BEARPONG is what beerpong would have looked like if we played it when we were 5-years-old.
Giant and epic in every sense of the word.
When I got the chance to get my hands on a deluxe BEARPONG kit, I jumped at the chance like a pedophile on a half-price panel van.
A Few short days after placing my order for the Deluxe kit, a non-descriptive brown package with “DO NOT USE KNIFE TO OPEN” emblazoned all over it arrived via UPS.
I carefully opened it and found much more than I expected. First of all it was heavy as shit which told me it wasn’t a bunch of cheap flower pots with some cheesy stickers on them. All 12 buckets had the BEARPONG logo embossed on them in white lettering and were all stacked neatly inside one another with two pre-inflated, over-sized pong balls nestled in the top bucket. It also came with a slick little pump for the balls and a set of play instructions.
All of this was inside a black nylon case with a heavy duty shoulder strap. I have to say, these guys did a really good job with the quality of both the kit itself and the carrying case. The only downside is that the whole package is round and sounds like a dead body rolling around in my trunk unless I wedge it in between the actual dead bodies in the trunk.
It was a while before I got a chance to break this bad mama-jamma out at an actual party, but when I did everyone went wild. Even the hard-core beer pong players we’re in Bush-era shock and awe.
The buckets are actually designed with great balance so that if you hit the rim the whole thing dumps over just like a real SOLO cup. Another great thing about this ginormous kit is that you can get creative with what you put in each bucket. You can put whole cans of Steel Reserve, cups of Four Loko, shots of Tilt and yes, you can even be an asshole and hide the occasional Smirnoff Ice in one of the buckets.
And from what I saw, BEARPONG is anyone’s game. Traditional beer pong skills don’t translate to BEARPONG. So even a professional like Nathan “Clutch” Thompson can get schooled on any given night at a game of BEARPONG.
So if you, or someone you know who you haven’t gotten a Christmas gift for yet, likes drinking games or are an absolute attention-grabber like me, I would highly recommend a BEARPONG kit. The Deluxe kit like I got was $65 well spent.
Here’s a link to their website. If you hurry they can get it to you by Christmas. And I have no idea whose dog that is.
Here’s some pics of the kit I got: