I absolutely love a good Black and Tan. However, it’s hard to find a bartender that can actually pour it right. The only option is to make one yourself. The problem is Black and Tan’s are made up of two beers that are pretty expensive unless you buy them in bulk at Sam’s Club. It’s the classic “catch 22.” Drink shitty $5 B&T’s at the bar or spend a fortune making them yourself at home.
They say necessity is the mother of invention. Or is it curiosity is the mother of invention? Either way, last night it was necessary that I have a B&T. The only problem was that I didn’t have all the ingredients for a traditional B&T. What I did have was three Natty Lights, two 24 oz Steel Reserves, and a blatant disregard for my own well-being. Oh, and of course curiosity.
I figured since Steel Reserve has a higher specific gravity than Natural Light, it should go in first. So I filled half the pint glass with Steel Reserve and then used a spoon to finish it off with the Natty. Apparently specific gravity has nothing to do with whether or not two liquids will or will not mix—has to do with thickness or something. Hey, I never claimed to be a chemist or a brew master. Just go with me on this one.
What I ended up with was almost entirely, but not completely, unlike a Black and Tan. It was definitely two beers mixed together. I was sure of that because I was there when they were mixed. However, there was no clear divide between the two brews. I was left with an amberish looking bastard child in a 16 oz glass.
What the drink lacked in visual character, it more than made up with a punch that would knock a horse on its ass. Believe it or not, the Natty actually tones down the pungent taste of the Steel Reserve and makes the whole thing very smooth and drinkable. So for half the cost (maybe less) of a traditional B&T I got a decent tasting beer with a high enough alcohol content to give a whole sorority a case of the DUI’s.
I think I’ll call it “Natural Reserve.”
Dylan says
Fail, somehow forgot to put the word “enjoy” in that sentence.
Dylan says
I thoroughly the way you write, and your motives for doing so. Keep it up.
Bubba says
Here’s an idea: Read the whole post and actually comprehend that I was making like Macgyver and making do with what I had. Ass hat. I shit bigger than your bar tabs.
Not a Jew says
Here’s a novel idea: actually apply yourself so that you don’t have to be a poor cocksucker that can’t afford to pay 5$ for a drink.
Meghan says
wtf? lol. Great.
Carl Hungus says
Wash down a couple of beans with that concoction and you might just wake up on an island in the Caribbean :)
Matt says
Genius! Another welcome addition to the college student’s “Get Drunk Cheap” arsenal. After awhile, you start to miss the esophagus lining that McCormick’s deftly stripped away.
Jeremy says
Desperate times call for desperate measures….
Nathan says
This is probably the worst idea I’ve ever heard.