Editors Note: This is another submission by Meghan Chiampa. If you think you have what it takes to write for The Drunk Pirate, send your submission to [email protected]
Are you a Junior who’s still trying to shed that Freshman 15? Here are five drinks and a few tips that will help you keep you from tipping the scales while you get your drink on.
Before we get down to brass tax, here are some general tips: The juice in bars is usually from concentrate, so try to find alternative mixers like cranberry. And if you are going to drink soda, stay with diet and ginger ale. Another thing to remember is tonic water has calories, while seltzer doesn’t.
That being said, there really are no super miracle low-calorie, low-carbohydrate drinks. As I’ve mentioned before booze is super sugar, so you aren’t really going to find many drinks under 80 calories.
Here are some low cal/good for you cocktails I enjoy.
Light Beers Don’t lie
They taste like shit, but Miller Genuine Draft Light really only has 64 calories. The rest teeter between 130 and 90. I would have to pick Corona Light, which is 109. And you can add a lime! Please for the love of god don’t drink that bud light with lime crap. I don’t understand that at all. (Editor’s Note: Bud Light Lime rules!)
Usually has a couple more calories than White, but I don’t want to get into caloric intake, it’s not necessarily what makes something healthy. These drinks I’m listing are “prescribed” because they taste good and have healthy properties. Red Wine contains antioxidants and properties that lower cholesterol and promote heart health. Red wine goes well with dinner too and makes you look classy. It’s cheap and you know what you are getting at a bar.
If you really want to cut down, get a wine spritzer which is white wine usually with seltzer and a lemon slice.
Yellow Tail is probably my favorite cheapo wine which tastes good. Rex Goliath and Charles Shaw AKA Two Buck Chuck (which you can find at Trader Joe’s) are also cheap and flavorful wines. Try organic if you really want to watch what you put in your body. Orleans Hill is cheap and organic and sulfite free.
Liquor, Straight Up
Liquor carries a lot of calories, but drinking it straight without calorie –laden mixers is the best way to go if you want to get hammered and still fit into your jeans from High School. Here are the stats about liquor and calories according to WebMD.com
• 80-proof vodka (40% alcohol; the most common type) has 64 calories per 1oz
• 86-proof vodka (43% alcohol) has 70 calories/1 oz
• 90-proof vodka (45% alcohol) has 73 calories/1 oz
• 100-proof vodka (50% alcohol) has 82 calories/1 oz
The best liquor for you in terms of being healthy is vodka. I would suggest Absolut or Smirnoff, which aren’t that high end and taste good on the rocks. Add a spritz of seltzer water and lime and/or lemon for vitamin C to dilute the taste if you’re a candy ass who can’t take it. For the strong willed, you can always take shots of anything. A Classic Martini is a no-fail drink. Makes you look awesome, tastes great, you get some olives for a snack and will give you a decent buzz after one.
Sugar Free 100% Juice and Gatorade
If you are going to a party or drinking at home I suggest making cocktails with this stuff. As I mentioned above most bars use sugar loaded juices. If you can buy the organic 100% juice stuff you are cutting down in sugars, carbs, calories and you’ll be getting more vitamins.
Gatorade sounds gross, doesn’t it? But mix it with a little Fris Vodka or Parrot Bay Rum and you might be surprised. It is almost undetectable with taste and smell and hydrates you. It is also low calorie (check the label some flavors have more than others). I knew a kid who drank this for a month and lost 30 pounds. He also biked a lot. But I think the Gatorade cocktail really helped in place of the case of Sierra Nevada he was taking in every week.
Perhaps the best drink ever. Full of veggies and vodka and only 125 calories! How can you go wrong? Different bars usually have a signature Bloody Mary so it is always fun to try something new. Please notice that vodka is involved with most of the “healthy drinks”. I don’t know why. Back in college I heard some stupid myth that clear booze is better for you than the dark booze. I don’t know if it is true.