By now you’re probably well aware of my affinity for the sick and twisted when it comes to beer. Yes, my beer of choice when I want to accomplish nothing more than getting totally ripped for as little as possible is Steel Reserve. With an alcohol content of 8.1%, Steel has been to drinkers what spinach was to Popeye. However, there are those who dare to test the boundaries of even the most seasoned and sophisticated drinkers.
Enter Joose.
Touted as a “Premium Malt Beverage,” Joose ups the ante with an alcohol content ranging from 9.0 to 9.9 depending on the flavor. “But James, you can’t compare Joose to Steel Reserve. Joose is malt liquor and Steel Reserve is a lager.” They both come in 24oz cans and are sold on the same shelf. They’re competitors.
Naturally I chose the flavor with the highest alcohol content to try. Orange Label, or Original Joose as it’s called has an alcohol content of 9.9%. As I’m writing this, I’m about 12oz into a 24oz can and I’m buzzing like a chainsaw. I’m not kidding. This shit is potent. Its punch does however come at a price. The taste takes some getting used to. That is of course if you like the taste of a beer after you dissolve an orange Airborne tablet in it. I’m not saying it’s bad, it just takes some getting used to (Honestly, this is the fastest I’ve ever gotten a buzz off of any type of alcohol).
Drinking Joose actually brings back some nostalgic memories of when I was a young lad who drank St. Ides because it was the strongest thing you could buy at a convenience store without the store clerk hassling you about “not having your ID with you” that clearly proved you were a 22-year-old organ donor from Daytona Beach.
So what’s the final verdict? Well, Joose had everything going for it in order to dethrone Steel Reserve as the cheapest and easiest way to get shit faced. That is until it comes to being the cheapest way to get your drink on. A 24oz can of Joose will set you back about $2.69. Compare that to a paltry $1.39 for an equal amount of Steel Reserve and Steel is the clear winner. Granted, Joose will get you 0 to drunk faster than Steel Reserve, but for the money, Steel Reserve will get you drunker in the long run. So long live the king.
Popularity: 5% [?]
October 28th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
the first time i ever had joose i drank 2 full cans and half of another…. needless to say i was shitfaced!!!!! but it tasted like shit and had me throwing up all night and day!!!! and joose here is only 1.99
November 5th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
i loved it, only i cant find it since ive been back in maryland….bummer!
November 5th, 2008 at 11:16 pm
oh hai joose ftw, im currently joosed at the moment and have been on joosed tilt!
I’m from meeechigan and the shit costs about $2 to $2.49 depending on the liqour store, steel reserve is about the same price. So if you like drinking shitty beer then proceed but if you want to get JOOSED holler at your boy!
friends dont let friends joose drive! also stay away from joose dialing!
JOOSED FTW
December 3rd, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Joose FTW indeed. I myself like to mix Dragon Joose (the purple one) with a little gin into something I call a Dragoon. But then I kind of want to die.
January 23rd, 2009 at 4:29 am
Joose is awesome….pounded two of them bishes…walked into the indian casino….and won $200
its amazing.
February 16th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
aha ;] looking foward to drinking it my friends always jack it from the liquor store near my school
March 6th, 2009 at 6:08 pm
I’m Joosed off my ass at the moment, one can of the 9.9% (the first time I’ve ever played with the stuff) and a can of Utica Club in 15 minutes, and you’re shitfaced.
GOOOOD STUFF!!!
March 10th, 2009 at 10:01 am
sure sure, the 211 is 1.39 for the 24oz, but ill be godamned if that steel reserve doesnt taste like a train full of hobos stopped to bathe in it
March 28th, 2009 at 10:34 pm
this ish is great, but where the hell do they sell jungle joose?? im in sc and we only have the orange and purple i’m getting sick of them personally…
April 15th, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Hey, cool tips. Perhaps I’ll buy a glass of beer to the man from that forum who told me to visit your site :)
May 10th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
they have this stuff called four loco around where i’m at (ohio)…crazy stuff. Like joose but goes up to 12%…still doesn’t taste good.
May 18th, 2009 at 10:52 pm
Jungle Joose is slowly popping up in SC, Just saw it at the oasis in spartanburg the other day. Still very rare, for some reason.
I love to start the night with a good, high-alcohol belgian beer so that I remember that beer can actually be tasty…and then slam a joose to melt my mind afterward.
May 27th, 2009 at 12:03 am
See, the real way to do it is to make a Fiona Apple, take a jungle joose and mix that mofo with the steel reserve. Theyre green and not horrible tasting an will get you fudgin drunk
June 22nd, 2009 at 2:15 pm
check out your local mobil gas station for jungle joose
August 8th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Yo don’t mess with the joose. It gets you wayyy too drunk wayy too fast. Last night i kicked down my front door and it wasn’t even locked and made and ass of myself in front of the neighbors and tried to fist fight one of my good friends. oh and both of my hands are swollen from punching things. JOOSE IS CONCENTRATED EVIL IN A CAN.
i had 3 cans of joose plus 4 or 5 budweisers. needless to say if i wouldn’t have had so much joose my night woulda went much better.
August 14th, 2009 at 10:49 am
Obviously you’ve never heard of Hurricane High Gravity, the real Steel Reserve killer. If it were up to me, however, I’d stick to Camo Black Ice.
December 13th, 2009 at 5:32 am
I do love me some Joose, but I’ve switched full tilt to the Four Loco, The Loko Uva (grape) flavor, branding of cheap drunkenings. It’s 12.0% alcohol, tastes like dragon joose, and comes in the same size can. it’s literally 4 beers + caffeine + taurine. I personally love the stuff, though, I actually like the taste of original JOOSE, and Dragon JOOSE. Granted with all that said, they’re 3.25/can here, but the price is the same for the Steel Reserve at the same mini-marts. It’s all good stuff really, but I’ll stick with my Four, but then again, I also love hard liquor.
March 7th, 2010 at 7:06 pm
Lots of Good information in your post, I bookmarked your site so I can visit again in the future, Cheers
April 14th, 2010 at 8:23 pm
Actually — for price – to – shitfaced ratio , There is a clear winner where I live (north of Seattle) — It’s called Earthquake – comes in a 24 OZ can and ranks in at a mind boggling 12 % alcohol per volume – and it’s only 99 CENTS at the Lucky Mart down the street … 2 bucks gets you slightly drunk.. 4 bucks gets you absolutely drunk.
Now on a regular drinking day, I’ll spend an extra buck 50 for a grape joose. I’m not often in the mood for such a strong tasting malt beverage as earthquake. Joose goes down so much easier.
May 17th, 2010 at 10:54 pm
man i drank more joose then any of you losers 3 cans take me to get wasted 5 have me shitfaced but 7 have me bananas but i drink 3 to 5 everyday i guess im built for it but those who stuck on the reg 1s try panther its good but lethal jooooooooosssssssssseeeeeeeeee 3500J
May 31st, 2010 at 3:08 am
Joose is
July 3rd, 2010 at 10:51 am
let’s just say I enjoy being tipsy and for years I’ve been a bud light guy. The other day the somber flourescent lights in the beer cooler at the local store shone heavily on what I call my new best friend. Joose holy cow this can gets you slammed. If you want a cheap drunk then I say joose to you. The taste is a bit to gey used too but I’ve tryed all 3 and the fruit punch is where its at. It will get you throwed
July 11th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Its all over washington N oregon im drinkin mamba rite now it taste like skittlez….!!!
October 6th, 2010 at 11:10 pm
The drink was fine, but got bathroom fucked in the ass by some guy with a Porsche.
November 14th, 2010 at 12:56 pm
you guys are pussies, get the 12% green apple, watermelon or rasberry lemonade. those really get you ripped, p.s. joose has energy stuff in it making it 10x better than SR imo
December 18th, 2010 at 10:52 pm
OMG…. I freakin LOVE joose!!! That was my favorite drink until they snatched it off the market!! Im REALLY PISSED at that!! The joose was the only drink I actually LOVED!!! It got you drunk off of one can!! An I have a high tolerance!!! I want the JOOSE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!